The Black male incarceration rate; higher than the national average unemployment; unacceptable drop out rates at middle and high school; the disparate treatment of black male in the health care community which results, in part, to the high rate of death in just about every category impacting the human race. And now the question: are men needed?

It’s no wonder black males are slow to respond as mentors, as leaders in their communities; even as heads of their own families.  There is so much that black males combat on every front - every day of their lives.  The above list just scratches the surface. Add to that list everyday things that occur for all of us, and it’s a wonder black men don’t question their own relevancy daily.

Who’s encouraging them to reach for their dreams, start that business, stay in high school, go to college or design that app?

This is where the women in the lives of black men can and must play a critical role.  We have to remind ourselves, we are created to be helpers to our men. We need to move past those “baby’s daddy differences.”  We have to see ourselves as the glue that holds relationships together and recognize being a strong woman also means meeting the challenge of helper to the man in our lives. This is a necessity; critical for the survival of black families.

I realize it can be tough sometimes because we don’t always feel like we want to support the men in our lives when we are on opposite sides of parenting, relationships or family issues. Sometimes, we must take the high road. Stay focused on the major goal and let the argument rest.  My granny, who will celebrate 103 years of life, God willing, on July 27, used to say, “The one with the most sense just be quiet.” 

I have found that in quietness comes the strength and the answers to those things I’m searching for - inner strength, energy for our children, our partners and our community.  All this comes of course by putting God first in our lives, every moment of every day.  It is through Christ, living steadfast in faith and knowing the glass is half full, that we and the men in our community can accomplish all things.